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    July 01

    找回我心中尚未崩坏的地方

     
    39.5°
    打了2夜的点滴,连最后一夜都无法陪幺爸走过,告别式还迟到了。
    看到他被推进火炉的瞬间,我们难以抑制地哭了。
    那时候想起很多,年轻时您的才华横溢浪漫聪颖,中年时您的大起大落大悲大喜,以及接近晚年以来的疼痛与无奈。
    人世所有苦难均已完结,希望大雨洗净通往极乐世界的道路,希望您一路走好。
     
    刚去了很久没有去的帆那边,小子的东西好像越来越有村上春树的味道。
    不知道是他一个人太久,比较能够发掘心底的声音,还是他始终停留在,最美好的时代,像彼得潘一样,不愿意长大。
    跟小王子一样的,内心有块尚未崩坏的地方,他在那里种花,思考,歌唱,悲伤,放弃规则,放纵去爱,放肆自己,放空未来。
    我心中那块地方,好像不知不觉间,荒芜了。
    看到他说音响里流淌出来莉莉周,才想起自己有很久没有听。
    以前浮躁烦恼的时候,习惯把莉莉周放进CD机,闭上眼睛被麦田环绕,以太就是一切,然后内心就平静了。
    越长大好像越混杂,我每天每天被这样那样的事情牵绊着,困扰着,我连用几分钟时间听下莉莉,整理下思绪,清静下内心都不能。
    不知道是烧到太高温,导致我意识模糊了,还是我不再年轻了,思维浑浊了。
    我努力想跳出那个躯壳看清自己,反而迷失了。
    我每天每天都很累,有快乐也有悲伤,也许是因为现实生活太过充实和忙碌,让我连放空缓和的时间都没有。
    我相也不影了,日志也不写了,我的兴趣和关心好像都不在这些东西上面了。
    我是不是离那个我们眷恋的纯真年代越来越远了?
     
    我看到他生日前一个人去北京游荡的点滴,突然也想一个人出行了。
    上一次一个人出行,好像是一年前了。
    一个人坐着火车穿过英国的东西南北,看着窗外变换的风景,又寂寞又美好。
    想一个人去陌生的地方,远离烦嚣,远离那些灯红酒绿,和一切嘈杂。
    如果可以,在黄昏时分,坐在田坎上,看着被风吹得起浪的稻田,喝一口小酒,眯缝着双眼,伴着Leonard Cohen的哼唱,ooh lah lah~
    我的浪漫情怀,又回来了。
     
     
    周末,去哪里走走吧。
    让我想一下。
     
    P.S.爸爸生日快乐!
     

     

    I saw you this morning.
    You were moving so fast.
    Can’t seem to loosen my grip.
    On the past.
    And I miss you so much.
    There’s no one in sight.
    And we’re still making love
    In My Secret Life.

    I smile when I’m angry.
    I cheat and I lie.
    I do what I have to do
    To get by.
    But I know what is wrong,
    And I know what is right.
    And I’d die for the truth
    In My Secret Life.

    Hold on, hold on, my brother.
    My sister, hold on tight.
    I finally got my orders.
    I’ll be marching through the morning,
    Marching through the night,
    Moving cross the borders
    Of My Secret Life.

    Looked through the paper.
    Makes you want to cry.
    Nobody cares if the people
    Live or die.
    And the dealer wants you thinking
    That it’s either black or white.
    Thank God it’s not that simple
    In My Secret Life.

    I bite my lip.
    I buy what I’m told:
    From the latest hit,
    To the wisdom of old.
    But I’m always alone.
    And my heart is like ice.
    And it’s crowded and cold
    In My Secret Life.

     

    Comments (5)

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    wrote:
    身体要养好才是根本!
    July 8
    汀 查wrote:
    so upset...come on, be a tough girl ,babe,give U a hug!
    July 6
    Rose Lowrote:
    毕竟不是文艺工作者,好好藏起来,然后down to earth!
    July 2
    Swan LIUwrote:
    莉莉周?
    就是德彪西阿拉伯风格组曲第一首罗
    July 1
    心中尚未崩坏的地方,浪漫情怀,纯真年代,看到的看不到的自己烦躁得模糊掉~理想得无可救药又理智得不可理喻~什么样的生活将要来,难道是末日。
    July 1

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